Favourite blog comments

 

One of the great delights in writing this blog in the past five months has been the quality of the comments it has attracted. Many are the comments are so good they could easily be guest blogs on the main page. So that’s where I’m putting some – in full or as extracts – today. I’ll probably make ‘favourite comments’ a more regular post but because this is the first, the ones I’ve selected go back awhile. And isn’t that last one by Kelsey (13) special? (#biasedmother).

Abigail – April 16, 2010 ‘Mr airbrush takes a day off ‘

I agree that tokenistic efforts like this do little good- marketing dressed up as benevolence. Similar to Unilevers Dove brand campaigns, when Unilever endorses The Biggers Loser under thier Flora brand. We will know when this issue has made head way when magazines showcase diversity without advertising it as their point of difference. We need to speak with our wallets and not purchase such tokenistic gestures.

Michelle – April 13, 2010  ‘Kate Ellis sends mixed messages with Grazia Shoot’

The whole concept of voting on women- not only the sexiest mp but also on celebrities as Lydia has highlighted demonstrates that a womans worth is still very much dependant on her appearance. Getting females to vote on celebrities is an alarming practice that is so mainstream now so many women do so without even considering the practice or its consequences. Essentially it is playing women off one another & reminds me of Foucault’s “panopticon”, the self governing jail, where “the sentiment of invisible omniscience” means that women must constantly watch themselves- because they are always being watched…

Antonella Gambotto-Burke  –  April 6, 2010  ‘Get porn out of the corner store say child health experts and advocates’

I cannot tell you how tired I am of being reminded of the second class status of women every time I buy a loaf of bread. I cannot tell you how tired I am of seeing young women deforming themselves in an effort to be attractive to men, whom they perceive as desiring only porn models. I do not want my daughter to have to ask – as, of course, she will one day ask – why girls are naked on the cover of magazines.

… the problem is the normalizing of pornography. The association of commerce with sexuality. And the masculinization of sexuality. Perhaps you have never known a man who was distorted by pornography, or perhaps they simply did not confide in you. I have known many. And they do have problems, a lot of problems. Problems with sexual confidence. Problems with sexual intimacy. A number stumbled onto child porn in the course of their nightly porn searches and it nearly ruined their lives. Others became addicted, and needed help. And others still became desensitized to the degree that they were no longer capable of identifying why pornography is antithetical to civilization…

Jennifer Drew – March 30, 2010  ‘A violent soul destroying act’: one girl’s story

Thank you Jackie for courageously speaking out concerning how the legal system too, silenced you and ensured the male rapist’s lies given far greater weight and creditability.

I happen to know how the adversarial legal system operates in respect of trying males charged with rape and how the system ensures the woman/girl is not even allowed to rebut the lies and insinuations defence counsel commonly charge her with. Far too many men and too many women too believe the innumerable rape myths and misogyny concerning women’s and girls’ supposedly innate untrustworthiness and who all supposedly seek to take revenge on ‘poor innocent respectable men.’  Read the full comment here

Selena – March 30, 2010 ‘ Would you like some popcorn with your extreme violence sweetheart?’

Dave Grossman, an ex-lieutenant, psychologist and writer, described in his book ‘On Killing’ (1995) the various ways that soldiers are taught to kill. The military does all it can to destroy mens’ natural inhibitions against killing. Violent films are a central part of it. They work very well and anyone in the army knows it. It’s hard to comprehend that people can still believe movies have no effect. Grossman is very concerned about popular culture (movies, games, music etc.) that seems to be related to escalating violence in the Western world. And of course rape is part of that, as well as being a regular feature in war.

Part of the problem with movies, he points out, is that extreme violence and horror begin to be associated with comfort, pleasure, soft drink, confectionary, and the intimate contact of one’s date…

Firefly b – March 29, 2010 ‘John Mayer loves himself’

John Mayer’s comments about prefering to be with his ‘virtual’ women is something I have recently personally experienced (… the problem is that porn addiction, just like drug & alcohol addiction is that other people are hurt and damaged by the porn addict. It is not a case of the porn addict just hurting themselves.)

I had recently been seeing a guy for just over a month. He had spoken of seriously pursuing a relationship with me, and said things like I was an ‘amazing woman’ and ‘beautiful person on the inside’. I had however noted that on some occasions his actions did not match his words in that I would not hear from him and he did not bother to ask how I had been etc.

I discovered that this was because he had decided that sitting in his room wanking over internet porn every night was much better than bothering with me. Until he wanted to use me for cuddles or care or just plain ‘ego trip’, I guess.  Read the entire comment here.

Jennifer Drew (again) – March 29, 2010 ‘Making children vulnerable to sexual danger and harm’

Emma Rush is correct the deliberate sexualisation and dehumanisation of girl children is not the sole cause for widespread male sexual violence against women and girls.

However, popular culture, mainstream media and not forgetting corporate advertising which consistently promotes the notion girl children are not human but males’ sexual service stations, reinforces and naturalises misogyny and belief only males are human. Females however have yet to achieve recognition they too are human and therefore entitled to be treated with dignity and respect…

 Caroline Norma –  March 25, 2010  ‘They didn’t “have sex” with the girl: they raped her’

The story reported by the Australian almost couldn’t have described a worse scenario for a 12-year-old girl to have to face. Not only was the girl pimped and raped, but she had her torture recorded, and was infected with STIs by the multitudes of men who raped her. This story should have been on the front page of every Australian newspaper, and should have been written in language that properly reflected the horror of the girl’s situation–which mainly consisted of being raped by over a hundred men. Perhaps properly labelling these men rapists, as Melinda suggests, will force authorities to take women’s interests seriously and have all the men brought to justice.

Kelsey- December 24, 2009 ‘Treating little girls as Ho Ho Ho’s’

Supre gets skankier and skankier and tighter and tighter nearly every week, as a part of the “new fashion”.

Me and my friends don’t wanna shop there anymore!!

Kelsey R (13) Ex  customer

                                                           

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I have the most supportive publishers in the world

Here’s a comment on another blog, posted by Susan Hawthorne at Spinifex Press.

April 8, 2010

Dear Mia,

As the publisher at Spinifex Press I want to thank you for mentioning Getting Real again on your blog (after your earlier positive comments on Getting Real). Getting Real is resonating with members of the community who come from a wide range of political views and life experiences. All want to bring about real change to girls’ – and women’s – lives – in exposing the pornified world we have to live in for its harmful ways. It has been incredibly gratifying to see a large and still growing number of international reviews from media outlets of all persuasions about Getting Real. Melinda Tankard Reist deserves full credit for putting together such an inspiring book. We are proud to be its publisher.